Gender-based violence + racism are tangled together through the same root: colonial definitions of “normal”.

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The “fairest of them all” problem  

Schools, movies, ads taught generations that beauty = white, English/French/Arabic = smart, “proper family” = Western blueprint. So when kids go through that system, they don’t just learn math. They learn what/who is “valuable”.

When the mind only has one angle

An “educated” person who was only fed one image of beauty, family, success… will recoil from anything outside that frame. That recoil is where GBV and racism also start. Not always fists. Sometimes it’s rejection, shame, control, “you’re not my type”, “don’t bring her home”. Mental limits → physical harm.

The internal turmoil you described

That guy who falls for someone his mind was taught to see as “less than”… his brain fights his heart. That fight turns into violence, suppression, or self-hatred. It’s not just about him + her. It’s him vs. everything he was fed since schooling started promoting a specific ideology.

Love is skin deep and learning is broader than what you were fed. If we don’t suppress or judge, the mind can expand. Freedom starts when we question: Who defined this for me?

@WINNIELADO

Written by

Winnie Lado

A writer, poet, songwriter, guitarist

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