You are in Kanoni, Gomba District.
You’re attending something; the semblance of what is supposed to be a trade show. Four and twenty minutes from now, the clock will strike midnight.
You tell a lady, Mpayo UG Pineapple.
She is manning the Shark of all the counters – the most prestigious one – in the drinks’ section.
She says, Oyo temuyina.
You tell her, Kare Mpayo UG Coconut.
She holds her breath. Touches a few bottles. All, briefly. Clears her throat.
Muyina UG Premium yeeka? you ask.
Nedda, she says. Tuyina Ambiance, mpozi ne Coffee.
You know better than to feign a legit status; better than to remain absorbed in that aura of self importance. You adjust your sails. You shift your goalposts.
You say, Bampeyo Ambiance.
She hands it to you for, I can’t remember, how much. But it’s a figure close to 1k.
You drink it in gallops. Tomorrow, you will wake up with nausea, and a throbbing headache. But who cares?
You’re nothing more valuable than a #MugOfPorridge