I am a well-known preacher of love because I feel love is everything and an emotion that keeps people bonded and committed to one another, or to something – because even God gave his only son for the forgiveness of our sins, hence he is a God that dresses himself to become a human being, so he did all that because of love. Therefore, we are delivered by our parents because of love, we live in love, we work because of having love for our jobs, and when we die, all people who pay condolences, who attend burial – having pain of losing their person – all these are done because of love. So we conclude saying love is everything, a solution and an answer. But there are some few reasons as to why marriage is not easy, yet it’s love that brings marriage.
FIRST OF ALL, WHAT IS MARRIAGE?
Marriage is a formal union social and legal contract between two individuals that unites their lives legally, economically and emotionally. So the fact of being married is called wedlock or matrimony.
BUT WHY IS MARRIAGE NOT EASY IN THIS GENERATION?
According to my research, many couples have failed to differentiate love and marriage, yet love is the mother of marriage. But still, there is a difference – love is for all, even singles, young, old etc since there are many types of love eg family love, friendship love, self-love, religious love etc With marriage, you select the person you want to spend the rest of your life with so marriage is like a bond between husband and wife to pass a journey of life. But what we have to know is, love is very important in marriage because it brings happiness, increases financial security, paves way to social equality.
Then, what takes away love in marriage?
If a woman gives birth she becomes a mother as a man becomes a father. So whenever a woman delivers, the percentage of love reduces from a husband to children. Also, whenever a man gets responsibility his mindset is now on looking for money because he is the head of the family so he has to pay school fees, medical care, food, security etc. so marriage changes to a responsibility. This has become a challenge to most couples as others are applying for divorce.
But if you want it too long last, what are the tips of maintaining it?
1. God first because he is the one who connected your heart to his. You said I love you but couldn’t see what is inside your heart so God is the controlling force
2. Commitment. This is a decision to be committed to another person, but most couples enter marriage when there are not ready with commitment hence side dishes are enjoying much love than the main source.
3. Respect. We define respect in marriage as a way of showing true appreciation for another person. Some ladies think the only way a man can show respect to a wife is through introduction. No, No, introduction is a cultural law but respect in the marriage is actually about the freedom to be yourself and to be loved for who you are.
4. Patience. This one means being able to prevent yourself from saying hurtful things to your spouse. Nobody is perfect so don’t judge but always apologize for your mistakes.
5. Trust. This is a faith you have in someone that you will always remain loyal. Marriage without trust is like a river without water therefore you may not trust the person you love but you can love the person you trust.
6. Intimacy is one on one connection that involves asynchrony between two people. With intimacy in a relationship, you’re willing to expose the most private angles of yourself.
7. Communication is very important because you know your partner’s love language and this is a way of expressing your feelings and emotions towards your spouse as you talk freely, openly, as you feel safe sharing the most private thoughts.
8. Having interest in what your partner loves, eg likes sports, music, etc. Hence his parents or hers should be considered as a key point, but in today’s generation, couples are not in good relationship with mother and father inlaws. Where do you expect blessings from yet the key to your next level is in someone’s plan because God works through men to men as he uses men to bless men and men to help men.
So if you want to settle in marriage, follow those guidelines as you live the life you love and love the life you live.