Denzel Maniple Everd
The first time you ever consciously walk away from something or someone, be it a bad behavior, an unhappy relationship, an unjust system or a way of life. The first and I think most incredible realization that you get is that, you didn’t die! It creeps up on you weeks, sometimes months or even years after you have severed ties with what you walked away from. And if it was something that you at the time thought you couldn’t live without, you are flooded with ecstasy because you just realized that your life is beyond just that thing, person or place. It validates the variety of your existence and vastness of your universe. However, a realization that creeps in even slower is the ease with which the next “No” or “I’m done with this” comes through your mouth. First off, we walk away most times, because the life we are living at the moment differs slightly or greatly from the life we think we deserve and that can be either positively or negatively. That said our self-worth is a difficult thing to measure, it even feels harder or just outright impossible to quantify. And yet in the society we have built for ourselves, we must constantly do so. This means we must learn the art of “letting go”. I wonder though, where the line that separates having a healthy valuation of yourself and the chance of learning something new, or experiencing something new that could make the quality of your life improve is. The ease that comes with walking away from situations that make us feel uncomfortable should be monitored and managed to a healthy degree I think. The “Nos” and the “I’m done with this” gets lubricated the more we do it and survive. I can’t help but think that it might be an overcorrection to a solution that came from a much more intense period of our life. Sometimes a situation requires a gentler and more thoughtful approach, it may require kindness, empathy and investigations to properly reach a more Just and equitable reaction. But the pain from a lived experience and the ecstasy gained from outliving a hellish existence pushes us to become entirely disagreeable. And I think that is something that is sad.It feels like we become softer and kinder and get taken advantage of and then overcorrect by becoming so tough and hard that we ignore and reject beautiful opportunities of growth and love and experience. Truly life must be a balancing act of holding on and letting go, and the only role we play is trying to determine which decision to make and when, and why and how…
Written by Denzel Maniple Everd
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