Mercy Geno Apachi
22nd December.
So, the festive season is here. The 10,000 unserious bunch of us- planned, Kampala kids- are scrambling last minute for available transportation.
Yours truly has had offers all week from generous owners of comfortable cars with long legs -inclusivity- space, Ā to travel upcountry, but alas, the lures and pollution of the ‘grand’ Kampala, kept me here until last minute.
Usually around this time, bus fares are trippled and without booking, one just might fail to find their way home- to the villages. So unserious as usual, I had packed all night but forgotten to book a bus!!! Meanwhile this came to me at 9:00am, travel day!!
My plan was to wake up 30 minutes to departure time in the morning and tell my boda to ride at break-neck speed to my favorite bus stop and I just pay when the conductor is making Ā his usual rounds within the bus asking for receipts Ā as we journey – as usual! But this plan cannot be solid during the festive season. Buses are booked and filled two days before the journey.
I rush to the bus park and of course serious people have already filled serious buses and are already starting to embark on the serious 5-7 hour serious journeys.
The only bus left to my destination has this gentleman in dreadlocks at the reception telling the last minute unserious batch to find other means because there was neither space to sit, stand nor pack luggage.
But planned kids don’t give up!
I still go ahead and make my way to this gentleman who immediately smiles when he sees me. I wonder if he knows me but he excitedly speaks up and beckons,
” Ehhhh Arsenal , Arsenal, Saka, Arsenal, wama you come!!”
I had actually forgotten I was wearing this jersey. Ā I will not lie- I have never owned a Jersey in life. I only watch soccer if I find it on. I particularly put my friend on gun point to give me this one because it is this cute baby pink color. (I own no gun)
He tells me how the fare is now 50k from the usual 30k. Planned kid is willing to pay but he stops her and says,
“Pshhh.. because you support Arsenal, you give me 30k.”
He goes on to address my concern for a comfortable seat in a bus with fully booked seats without my name in it.
” Ahhh you don’t worry. Just because you are wearing an Arsenal jersey, I am going to call passenger number 26 and tell her the bus has left,” we both throw back our heads and laugh sinfully..
Now the only issue left was that I had a big suitcase and they couldn’t afford to leave and behind. Even his manager came by, looked at the suitcase, looked at the man, shook his head in disapproval.
My dreadlocked friend looked at me and threw another loud villain laugh,
” Arsenal you don’t worry at all. I will find where to put your suitcase.”
Ladies and gentlemen, I am enroute Northern Uganda, undeservingly seated at the front on a comfortable two seater, number 26. The humps and potholes will have nothing on me. The worthier travellers left behind because they had neither luck nor the universe’s hand of mercy (wait that’s my name) nor the pride to show off their jerseys shall by all means find all other means.
Yours truly is remorseless. Such is life!
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