Corrie Kempiiha
Bethany’s eyes flew open.
6:30 a.m.
Time to get up.
She hated mornings. Not because of the waking, but because she never woke up like other people. No yawns, no slow stretch, no lingering in a dream. Her eyes simply burst open, as though chased.
It’s probably because I always wake up from a nightmare! she thought.
She tried to remember the dream she just woke up from.
I think it was about Sandra, my sister, or was it one of my workmates. I can’t remember!
She tries to think hard about her dream.
Was I thinking about Sandra last night? Why would I dream about something and then forget it?
While she tries to catch the tail of her dream, a chill runs up her spine.
Her toes shiver. She curses herself for forgetting her socks last night.
Why is this apartment so cold? She thinks angrily.
She brushes off the feeling and begins to ‘prepare’ to pray. While lying in bed of course. It’s too cold to sit up.
Say the usual “this is the day the Lord has made.” So she begins “This is the day that the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it. Lord, I thank you for my life, my family, my friends…” What friends? What family? Sandra? Is Sandra okay? What about that dream? And what life?
Bethany has always felt she lives a life that’s not really worth living. Unlike the lives her ‘friends’ live on Instagram, hers is a perfectly normal one. Work, home, cook, YouTube, sleep, repeat. To be sincere there’s not much to be grateful for. And maybe it’s her fault that she doesn’t excite herself as much.
I should explore the world, take myself to restaurants and meet friends. But it costs too much. And then I have to dress up and put on makeup. No. It’s not worth it. But maybe if I could……
Bethany’s eyes shoot open. Again. She grabs her phone. It’s now 7:30am.
Okay. It’s really time to wake up now. I will pray while brushing my teeth.
With courage, she lowers her feet onto the tiled floor.A sneeze threatens to consume her. Goosebumps creep from her legs, climbing all the way to her arms.
Why is this place so cold???
She gets out of bed.
Again, she remembers the socks as she walks across her two-room apartment to the tiny kitchen.
She grabs the kettle and fills it with water. Droplets splash her hand, and suddenly she remembers her old place.
It was small, she reminds herself. Two rooms, no kitchen. At least the bathroom was inside. The walls shook with music from the bar next door, and below her, another cramped two-room apartment.
Maybe that’s why it wasn’t so cold.
The rent was less by 100,000 Uganda Shillings and had no wardrobe.
I really have come from far.
She switches on the kettle and heads to the sink.
The toothbrush is wet in her hand. The first rinse hits her tongue, ice-cold water settling heavy in her mouth.
Banange even the water is cold!!!
She tries to cast her mind away from the weather. She should be grateful. Grateful to live another day. Grateful that she’s in a bigger and better apartment. Grateful that she can afford not only the necessities of life but also a few luxaries.
It’s because she’s been 4 months in her new job. It can be quite tiring being an accountant for a printing and publishing company at Nasser Road. But the allowances are great and the people are fun.
Her boss is a creative. As all graphic designers should be. She is grateful to have a boss like him. Until it’s time to discuss the company expenses. She always gets panic attacks the day before she knows she has a meeting with her boss.
He’s one of those people you just don’t tell how to use their money. Especially when he begins to lecture her on how hard he has worked for it. And then, shoots a satisfying smile at her, like a reward for putting her in her place.
Beth hates the back and forth and the lashes she gets from her boss. But from the time she began working 7 years ago, she has since learnt not to air out her thoughts and opinions to her bosses.
Ours is not to reason why after all!
After she’s done brushing her teeth, she remembers she forgot to pray.
Again…
I will think of a time to pray.
She goes to her wardrobe and picks out what to wear.
I must wear trousers so I can easily climb a Boda Boda at lunch time. Beth remembers she is meeting her mother for lunch. And her sisters are coming along. She doesn’t know why they all decided to have lunch with her today but she’s going anyway.
They always claim they never see much of her. Maybe because when they do all they talk about is their kids. She’s not excited to see her sisters. But she’s a bit excited to see her mother. Just a bit excited anyway.
She’s a good person. I don’t know her that well but she seems nice.
As she reminisces of the relationship with her mother, the right top catches her eye and she reaches to grab it. Her hand moves so fast she feels the cold breeze racing up her arm.
Why is this apartment so cold?
She reaches for the top and trousers, sets them on her bed and goes to shower. She is determined to take less than 10 minutes in the bathroom. Something she couldn’t do before she moved here.
Moving to the top certainly has its disadvantages.
While she sprinkles water on herself, convincing herself that she is determined to get clean, she thinks about how far she has come. Which to others, isn’t far away. She wasn’t raised in a life of struggle. Surely there were always ups and downs but compared to many stories she has heard, hers wasn’t such a sad story. Hers isn’t a story at all. No one would make a movie out of it. She is just a normal middle kid raised from a normal middle class family. She studied and graduated, and got a low earning job and began to work to the top. She is nowhere near the top yet. But she’s somewhere. Somewhere in the middle. Just like the rest of the aspects in her life.
It’s not great, being in the middle. There’s nothing to show for it. You’re not good enough at anything to specialize, and not bad enough at anything to quit.
Just floating.
Nothing grand ever happens. Nothing tragic, either.
This probably isn’t the way she should be living. She has seen girls her age and younger living exciting lives; travelling, getting married, starting businesses, and even climbing up the crazy Ugandan corporate ladder. Actually all those things could be exciting depending on how you look at life. But they do happen. She’s sure they happen because she has seen it all.
On social media.
Beth gets out of the bathroom shivering. Now she needs to dress up quickly or she will begin to sneeze. She wipes her body and begins the daunting process of dressing up.
She thinks about all the work she has to do today. For someone who loves living a simple life, she really made hers complicated by being an accountant. She doesn’t hate the job but there’s just so much to do. Maybe she should have been an influencer. Or a business woman. A small smile crosses her lips. Who is she kidding? Being an influencer is hard. Especially if you are as introverted as she is. She’s perfect for this job. She knows it.
You talk to people once in a while and keep to yourself the rest of the time. It’s perfect.
Now she’s done dressing and goes to the mirror to take a look at herself. No makeup today.
I know I won’t meet anyone important. I never do anyway.
A slight smile creeps up on her again.
My life isn’t that bad. It’s not adventurous or tragic. And that’s just the way I like it.
She shivers again.
Well….. It would be just the way I like it if this place wasn’t so cold.
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