Nakassagga Leticia
There’s a fatigue in our generation when it comes to love, the kind that comes from trying, giving, believing, and breaking, over and over again. It’s the exhaustion that makes the advice “There is someone out there for you” or “You will find someone” ring empty for those on the edge of giving up.
We are the generation that has seen too much: too many love stories that didn’t last, too many Instagram-perfect couples who broke up, too many situations that ended with “I’m not ready for anything serious.” We navigate an anti-social world through screens, a culture where some people actually expect sex on the first date and look at you crazy if you don’t agree. We hear terms like “love bombing” and “bread crumbing” to describe behaviors that are now frighteningly common.
This exposure has taught us to be guarded, even when we crave connection. We talk about “soft life,” but when it comes to love, we’re armored, cautious, strategic. We ghost before we get ghosted. We replay voice notes ten times to decode emotion, analyzing texts like they’re puzzle pieces, wondering: Is this real, or not? We even lay next to people, risking parts of ourselves and feeling a profound lack of respect.
It’s exhausting.
Love in the Age of Screens and Scars
In a world of endless swiping and fast connections, it often feels like we’re all looking for love in all the wrong places. We swipe, scroll, match, unmatch. We text for weeks and never meet, or meet, feel a spark, and watch it fizzle for no clear reason. The paradox is: more choice, less commitment. We can talk to ten people in a day yet still feel utterly alone. Cheating has become so normalized, people no longer feel guilty about it. There’s no patience, everyone is broken, and too many run around breaking people even more. For women, the ticking biological clock adds another layer of profound pressure, making dating feel like a race against time.
Most people want the benefits of a relationship without the commitment, leading to that “married but not married” limbo. At this point the issue is not about whether a man’s biology can just be with one woman or not, but the pervasive lack of responsibility where men juggle women from one to another, exploiting the abundance of choice.
We crave romance, yet fear trusting it. We yearn for vulnerability, but dread being seen and rejected. We long for consistency, yet have made peace with the bare minimum.
The worst part? We begin to doubt ourselves. Is it me? Am I too much? Too soft? Too emotional? Too serious? We start to wonder if we are the problem. So, we shrink, we detach, we say “we don’t care” even when we do. We carry our own emotional weights, and others are eager to unload theirs onto us “I hear, to humble you.” Hee…
And yet, beneath the fear, the sarcasm, the “I’m fine being single” energy, is hope.
A stubborn hope: that maybe there’s someone who will understand our softness and not exploit it or take it for granted; someone who won’t run or become selfish when things get real; someone who will choose us with intention not because they’re lonely, but because they truly see and want us.
This hope persists in the way we listen to love songs alone, in how we pray for our future partner, and in how we still show up on first dates with excitement.
The Healing We Must Do
People often don’t work on themselves, and the one who does is expected to adjust or cater to those who are not accountable. It feels like you have to lower your standards. But perhaps the true shift begins not with finding someone, but with becoming ready for the love we want. Not the readiness of “I want someone,” but the deep readiness that declares:
“I know who I am now. I know how I love. I know what I need.”
This means healing the wounds that led us to chase unavailable love and unlearning the scarcity mindset. We must challenge the belief that good partners are rare as an excuse to clinging to unhealthy relationships. While some have set too many boundaries and need to learn how to let people in, true healing is about setting healthy boundaries and choosing peace. It means becoming the kind of person we would want to date.
Recognizing your own patterns and how they impact your relationships is the first step. For women especially, reframing the pressure of the biological clock is part of this healing, understanding that your worth and timeline are your own, not dictated by societal expectations. Give yourself a chance to exploit an identity outside serving someone.
The Love We Still Deserve
Even if we’ve messed up, even if we’ve stayed too long in situations that didn’t serve us, even if we ghosted someone good, even if we’re just now learning how to love better, we still deserve love. Because we’re growing. Because we’re trying. Because our hearts, no matter how bruised, are still soft. It doesn’t make you naive to believe that someone, somewhere, could choose you deeply, gently, intentionally.
To The One Who’s Tired, But Still Believes
You are not the sum of who left or who stayed. Your desire for real love is not outdated. And one day, maybe someone will see your heart and say, “I’ve been waiting for this.”
But until then,
Hope. Heal. Don’t settle for less.
I pray we all find healing, know who we are, what we need and communicate it.
This post was created with our nice and easy submission form. Create your post!
